2.3: The Underwater Menace

In which a mad scientist hiding under the ocean turns people into fish, and then they go on strike.

Broadcast: January-February 1967

Watched: August 2019

This one’s half missing: episodes 1 and 4 are represented on the DVD release by a “recon”, photographs and the occasional clip, accompanied by the soundtrack. Historically, it was widely considered to be awful, possibly the worst story the show produced in the 1960s; but my sense is that people have been a bit more forgiving since episode 3 showed up in 2011, and suddenly realised that it’s a lot funnier and more knowing than they’d previously thought.

I did briefly at this point in my journey consider pretending I’d skipped it entirely, mostly to give James Cooray-Smith a breakdown, but I didn’t, I watched the first episode on my phone at Dublin Airport, which is a surprisingly good way to enjoy bad Doctor Who. Anyway, please do considering buying Jim’s Black Archive on this story as he’s been banging on at me to mention it for a fortnight. 

The Underwater Menace, Episode 1 

Dumb as anything but knowingly so. Feels like it belongs in the same corner of pulp Dr Who as The Screaming Jungle, but much arch-er. Zaroff is actually quite funny.

Does no one on the TARDIS sleep? This takes place literally moments after the last story ends. Mind you, the way the Doctor keeps going for naps is a bit odd. As his enthusiasm for the food. Love Polly taking the piss out of his hat obsession.

It feels like this episode actually covers quite a lot of ground. It’’s fairly empty but there’s a lot of incident. 

But why the obsession in the Lloyd years with stuff showing that Dr Who is his name?

The Underwater Menace, Episode 2.

“Can’t you see I am talking with my friend here.” The friend in question is an octopus, a subtle sign that Zaroff might not be entirely there.

Again, there’s a lot of incident. A lot happens even if a lot of it isn’t very meaningful (e.g. Jamie falling off a thing). There’s even an educational bit – twice! – as we learn that steam in an enclosed space will cause an explosion. Living up to the show’s original goals, definitely.

The costumes are hilariously mental. This is also in the same genre as the last few minutes of The Rescue.

Zaroff is our first proper mad scientist, isn’t he? Also I thought this was the first body horror, but I forgot the Vargas, it’s just the first bit that almost affects a regular.

Ara may be the worst performance the series has yet seen.

Anyway: this is more fun than its reputation would have it but also Doctor Who is a lot worse than it used to be. Not sure we’ve had two meh stories in a row before, and next it’s the f***ing Moonbase.

The Underwater Menace, Episode 3

The priest’s “no, kill me too” act is fucking stupid. The sacrifice ritual is mental – kids with horse’s heads! Also, is this the first time we’ve had large numbers of child extras?

The voice of Amdo bit is sort of brilliant. So is the idea this story turns on industrial action among the fish people.

The market scene is probably the silliest thing we’ve seen since Web Planet. This story is bordering on psychedelia.

Is it meant to say something that the two labourers the regulars ally with are both from countries Britain colonised?

The fish people revolting is actually madder than what came before. They put this on television!

Why are these people falling for Zaroff’s “I’ve got a really bad headache” act.

Contrarian take: “Nothing in ze vorld can shtop me now!” is a great moment. This story is insane but it isn’t dull. We haven’t seen it before. Beats what’s up next, I’ll warrant.

The Underwater Menace, Episode 4

And just when you think it can’t get any madder, the Doctor’s plan is to flood the fucking place. Mental.

So sad we can’t see Troughton’s reaction to “Look at him, he’s not normal is he.”

As if this story wasn’t mental enough already it ends with the Doctor blowing up a city. Which must have been interesting to film. Pity we can’t see it really.

And then there’s an emotional bit and then the TARDIS nearly crashes. It’s mental.

Anyway, that was that.